The debate on parenting methods: Is it necessary to express love to children with words?
Michael Owen admitted that he does not say the phrase "I love you," relying instead on his actions. Psychologists and parenting authors have commented on the importance of verbal support for a child's emotional well-being.
Abdulrahman Sadikhli2 min read
Former England national football team striker Michael Owen found himself at the center of a debate after stating in a podcast with Jamie Laing that he never tells his four children that he loves them. He emphasized, however, that they are the "most precious people in the world" to him. According to Owen, he prefers to demonstrate his feelings through actions, believing that most parents do the same.
The athlete's statement sparked a mixed reaction. Some parents expressed bewilderment, calling the approach "terrible" and insisting on the necessity of daily verbal confirmation of love. Others, conversely, supported Owen's position, agreeing that actions speak louder than words.
Educational psychologist Dr. Patricia Brito notes that for a child, the most important thing is to feel safe, supported, and emotionally stable. In her view, the absence of words of love does not automatically mean psychological damage if the child sees manifestations of care. However, the expert emphasizes that the ideal scenario is a combination of words and actions.
“If you constantly tell your child 'I love you' but don't attend their sports matches or important events, the words can seem empty,” explains Dr. Brito. Parenting author Aaron Deal agrees, believing that words should serve as a means of conveying a message, while actions serve as practical proof. Deal also noted that excessive use of words without supporting actions can devalue their meaning.
During the conversation, Michael Owen admitted that he would like to be "a bit softer" in expressing his feelings. He also shared his emotions regarding his son James's loss of vision in 2024, noting that he would have been willing to give his own eyes to help his child. Owen acknowledged that he is gradually becoming more open, but is not yet ready to freely say the words of love.
Experts attribute such attitudes to cultural, social, and gender stereotypes. Aaron Deal emphasizes that many fathers still mistakenly believe their role is limited to providing for the family's material needs. According to experts, it is important for children to feel their significance, their sense of belonging to the family, and to understand that they are valuable individuals, regardless of the method of expressing affection chosen by their parents.
Source: aawsat.com
